Sunday, June 26, 2011

Doubts and Insecurities.

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I hope you had a great weekend! Mine was busy... but that's always the best kind for me. On Friday, I went to see Hangover 2 with my mom and sisters (save your money, see a nice chick flick instead). I worked a double shift on Saturday. Funny thing, I actually like being back on the JOB.

Working at Noodles is pretty enjoyable. I really like the people I work with, interacting with customers, and making people happy. :) Mac n' Cheese can make people happy like no food I have ever seen.

I also like being back on my routine. I agree that I am a bit of a routine freak, but hey, it works for me. That is one thing I would like to work on though in the long run... learning to be more flexible, roll with the punches, be okay when something isn't exactly in order.

That being said, a lot of my self-doubts and insecurities in life have to do with always wanting order in life. I freak out when things are a little different than normal.... and I don't know how to handle life when it's not under my control. I convince myself that I have to be absolutely perfect to be loved. I believe that anything less than perfect makes me inadequate and incapable of finding true love.

A great life lesson... I am not going to find anyone to love me if I am not in love with myself first. It is not that I don't like the person I have become, I am just extremely hard on myself. I have unrealistic expectations sometimes, and I worry that it may drive people away.
I would love nothing more than to find someone that loves me for me. I know he is out there and I know he is worth waiting for, but it is so hard to be patient. Can't he just jump out and scream WAKE UP, I AM THE MAN FOR YOU?

Until then, I will keep waiting and praying. I will keep learning to love myself- and all of my doubts and insecurities as well.

How do you continue to love yourself? What's your secret to self-acceptance?

"But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me."
2 Corinthians 12:9


1 comment:

  1. I hear ya! Loving yourself is hard. I struggle with it all the time. I just keep thinking that if I surround myself with positive energy and give that vibe out to people then they will give that same positive energy back to me. It's def not easy, and it's something I have to think about everyday!


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